The Twenty-First Century Apology
This Globe story isn't inherently all that interesting. However, it contains as perfect an example of the postmodern apology as I've seen. Here we go:
"I am aware that certain remarks made during my recent deposition have received widespread attention and that people have found them hurtful," the Rev. William Loyens, 77, wrote to Harold Brown, president of the Tanana Chiefs Conference. "For this I am sorry and I apologize."
A postmodern apology goes like this: "Certain oversensitive people may have managed to take offense at my perfectly innocent remarks. I apologize for their touchiness." Who one is actually apologizing to remains unclear. Could it actually be the offended parties? That makes the form: "I apologize to you for your getting offended."
Though no major party or faction seems entirely immune to them, the RC church seems particularly addicted to the form. I've seen several statements from bishops that essentially said, "though we engaged in no wrongdoing, we apologize for any perception of wrongdoing that may have erroniously formed." It seems like moral absolutists are perhaps a hair more likely to engage in this particular sort of expedient relativism than the other side of the aisle.
All of which sort of begs the question of whether a gap between reality and perception still exists in these matters, or if what's perceived is therefore what's real. Think of Al Gore making all those self-deprecating jokes about having claimed to invent the internet despite never having done so. Go back and look at that Globe article. In a piece about the controversy excited by a particular assertion, the writer never sees fit to quote what the line actually was.