Silliness is Golden :: diaries :: diary

Wed, Nov 30, 2005

Polite Pretense

I'm starting a new religio-scientific movement. We argue that although God created the universe in a week a couple thousand years ago, He included such an enormous and painstaking amount of evidence for billions of years of history that it would be downright rude to not act fooled. Just as courtesy demands that you act surprised at a surprise party, even if you saw it coming, only a boor would acknowledege that he sees through the evidence of an old universe.

UPDATE: Lore has his own competing theory

[/diaries/diary/glossary/] comment

Topical Quotes Roundup

Former Rep, "Duke" Cunningham is not a good man. As a congressman, he's shown himself to be a sleazy, corrupt, war-mongering bigot. On Monday he pled guilty to accepting millions of dollars in bribes from defense contractors. (Up until his day in court, he'd insisted he'd done nothing illegal. Last year, when the investigation into his antics started, Tom DeLay called him "an honorable man of high integrity.")

However, Cunningham's speech to the press that day was a rare and laudable thing--a genuine apology. Since I've written previously on how our moral absolutists weasel and dodge when it comes time to take responsibility for their own actions, it seems only right to give credit to an exception:

I'm resigning from the House of Representatives because I've compromised the trust of my constituents.

The truth is I broke the law, concealed my conduct and disgraced my office.

I know that I will forfeit my freedom, my reputation, my worldly possessions, and, most importantly, the trust of my friends and family.

The Boston Globe reports that the FCC wants to crack down on sexuality on cable television, opening with a typically lurid headline ("Smut on cable, satellite TV targeted"). For me, the most interesting part of the piece was a quote from FCC chairman Kevin Martin on why stricter regulations are needed:

You can always turn the television off and, of course, block the channels you don't want, but why should you have to?

Why should you be burdened with controlling what you view, when we can control it for you? Why indeed.

Ion, who still refuses to get a blog, because he's a Bad Person, pointed me to Orrin Hatch's remarks on a Fox News show:

The Democratic Party seems to be taken over by the Michael Moore contingent in their attitude toward Vietnam, and they continually call for a withdrawal of troops at a time when we haven't finished the job.

Apparently no-one commented on his error at the time, and the official transcript actually read 'Iraq' rather then 'Vietnam' until bloggers pointed out the flub.

History repeats itself--the first time as tragedy, the second time as Freudian slip.

[/diaries/diary/politics/] comment

Sun, Nov 27, 2005

Stabilize your age...or else

The American Airlines in-flight magazine has a warning about Deep Vein Thrombosis. Among the risk factors for DVT, it lists "increasing age."

My age increases at a rate of one hour per hour. I understand that's about average. I suppose that since people in my situation have a 100% mortality rate, I shouldn't be too surprised that it's considered a hazard.

[/diaries/diary/silly/] 1 comment

Thu, Nov 24, 2005

Turkey Necks!

I'd never gone out and bought turkey necks before. I was cooking Thanksgiving dinner for my mother and myself. She has no particular fondness for the turkey bird, and has instead invested her ritual and cullinary Thanksgiving focus on some more eccentric traditional family dishes--particularly saurkraut with pork, mashed potatoes with cream, sweetened stewed tomatoes with lots of butter, and succotash with lots of butter (apparently the West Virginia town my mom is from was heavily settled by German immigrants).

I'm in DC to spoil her rotten as she recovers from an operation, so I was determined to make her these dishes. As I saw it, if there wasn't going to be turkey, there at least had to be turkey gravy. That's where the necks come in. Turkey necks are like a buck something a pound--I wasn't particularly anxious to economize, but there is something very gratifying about cooking with turkey necks in the era historians will one day refer to as the Boneless Skinless Age.

Brown them well, simmer them in water with an onion and some herbs for a couple hours, scrape the surprisingly rich and abundant slivers of meat off before throwing away the bones, and you have the basis for some truly rockin' gravy.

The saurkraut was also a success. I browned a tenderloin in bacon grease, covered it with drained saurkraut, and poured a bottle of beer and a few ounces of gin over it. After a few hours of simmering uncovered over a low heat, the saurkraut had gone from white to light brown, and the pork was tender enough I could break it apart with my spatula.

It did turn out to be about six people's worth of food for two stomachs, but fortunately my brother the vacuum cleaner arrives to spell me tomorrow.

[/diaries/diary/food/] 1 comment

Mon, Oct 17, 2005

Quote of the Week

Harriet Miers solves the world's problems:

"More and more, the intractable problems in our society have one answer: broad-based intolerance of unacceptable conditions and a commitment by many to fix problems."

[/diaries/diary/politics/] 3 comments

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